That’s the person (the soul) the Holy Spirit will parent into a powerful son or daughter of God.ĭescribe a difficult time emotionally when you listened to the leading of the Holy Spirit. We are doing the inner work, the unlayering, and the uncluttering, to get to that person. ![]() Can you see the person you were created to be? Once I get past the signs of aging on my face and look into my own eyes, I always see the passionate, bright-eyed girl I was created to be. Rather, look into the mirror and observe the eyes looking back at you-your very own. It’s easy to judge, until you take the speck out of your own eye and take a good look in the mirror.īut as you look in the mirror, don’t judge yourself either. I know adults that respond and react like a toddler when they are overwhelmed by emotions, stress, or life in general. This is the age and stage I found myself stuck in. My choice to heal and grow or to stay imprisoned and become bitter and angry.ĭo you find yourself reverting to the behaviors of a certain age when facing a trying moment? When wounded and disregarded I have a tendency to act like a sulking teenager. It was never about the clutter of the person that wounded me it was always about my own soul clutter. In the stillness and quiet, He would give me a clear view of the clutter. In a most loving way, He would parent me. I’d empty my soul and sit in stillness, and in that stillness the Lord would deal with me. In the closet it would begin with a pity party and then a good long cry. At some point I stopped crying out in the kitchen and began retreating to my closet. Many have, indeed, included the floor-the bathroom or closest floor to be exact. The meltdowns of my recent adult years have been steeped in pain and what has often felt like disregard. I had never learned to regulate my emotions. Suddenly I knew something I had never known before. Of course, I was watching her-the intense show-but it was as if I was looking beyond her and back at myself. All the while she was spiraling, spinning, panicking. Her little kid meltdowns were just that-little kid meltdowns.īut then one day, when she became a teenager and was having a not-so-little meltdown-emotions whirring like the engines of a jet plane-I tried to calmly talk her down (even as my emotions began to whirr). In elementary school her dramatic personality was evident among her peers. However, when emotions are in check, Ella and I are quite logical, commonsense kind of gals. Like me, when Ella becomes overwhelmed, her emotions become larger than life and cloud up every inch of logic. Dramatic is passionate, lively, expressive, artistic, colorful, and, yes, entertaining. Ella has taught me that dramatic is not bad. Watching her grow up has gifted me the ability to learn a lot about myself that I did not, could not, see in my younger years. Children are an excellent mirror.Įlla and I are very different and very much the same. I did not come to this conclusion when I reached a certain number of years. Emotional maturity has nothing to do with chronological age. However, now that I am a grown-up, I ascertain that age is no indication of maturity. It’s easy to believe you are grown up when you reach a certain age and begin to pay bills, hold a job, get married, and have children of your own. My cousin once said, “Trina, you’re so dramatic!” I remember piping back, “No, I’m not!” with my trademark eye roll and probably a stomp to prove her wrong. However, there are people who do remember and there is a photo to prove it. Those memories are fuzzy to me, and I’d rather not remember. I’d feel overwhelmed and it’s almost like I’d become overwhelm personified. ![]() When I was a teenager, it wasn’t beyond me to, occasionally, lie on the kitchen floor and cry, like a little kid who didn’t get their way.
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